The AntiKris

Photobucket Misanthrope. Sweetie Pie. I complain alot, because there's alot to complain about. I laugh alot. I am just your run of the mill NYC asshole with lots of sass and a nice ass. This tumblr thingy is an attempt to let society into my mental ghetto and to share my daily irritations, inspirations, and investigations....
contact me at:
theantikrisnyc at gmail
myspace.com/antikris
theantikris.com
P.S., This is Mylover. Photobucket
August 21
“ You have a mouth as sharp as a dagger, but a heart as soft as tofu. If you believe that, your brain is like chow mein dropped on the floor. My fortune sent via Verizon Wireless. 
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onemoretimewithfeeling:

emilyposts:

One of my biggest beefs with Midwest dialect? It’s PIC-TURE not PIT-CHER. There actually is something called a pitcher. You pour liquid from it. A picture is something you frame and place on your desk.

That bothers me too. I have lived most of my life in Michigan, but I definitely don’t pronounce it PIT-CHER.

HAHAHA!  When I first moved to NY from VA, I said “pitcher”.  A woman from work corrected me and for the first years of living here I would say “picture” correctly, but unfortunately I over corrected and when trying to order a “pitcher” of beer, I’d order a “picture” of beer.  xx AntiKris

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Every picture of Michael Phelps should be shot from this angle. 
Every picture of Michael Phelps should be shot from this angle. 
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Madonna’s tour should be called “Hot & Crusty” in honor of her menopause and oldness. (and in honor of a certain friends favorite pizza place. :p)
Madonna’s tour should be called “Hot & Crusty” in honor of her menopause and oldness. (and in honor of a certain friends favorite pizza place. :p)
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Whore on the go One of my followers sent me this link and said I may enjoy.  Thank you, sir.  However, I already carry all that shit with me now.  Who is it you think you are talking to?
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Adventures in cuntiness: example #1

I received the following email from a reader.


Please find a non-Julia-Allison-style way to feature your aforementioned Kim Kardashiashainnn-like ass on your blog.

Thank you for your time and attention.

~MD

My response.

Considering I dont read Julia Allison’s blog, I will go ahead and stick with my current ass description stylings.  Thanks for the advice though. 
 
xx
AntiKris

(I am sure I’ve got Ms. Allison beat in the Kardashian ass department and I think I may just be older than her, so…it’s mine to use. Keep coming with the suggestions though, people.)

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Hmm

Well yesterday I didnt really blog because I was in the depths of period hell, but I somehow managed to gain something like 30 followers.  Perhaps people like me more when I keep my mouth shut?  It’s a good thing for me I am ok with being disliked and am probably going to be a raging internet cunt today.  I am back, bitches

Kiss Kiss,

AntiKris

August 20
Gratuitous pic of yourself Wednesday.  The still in bed with cramps version
Gratuitous pic of yourself Wednesday.  The still in bed with cramps version
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cajunboy: Yoda, the cat with four ears. This is real and I kinda want him. (via The Daily Mail)

cajunboy:

Yoda, the cat with four ears. This is real and I kinda want him.

(via The Daily Mail)

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Here are three things I have seen in the past three minutes inside the house I am housesitting:

Dear Keepinganotebook,

FUCKING RUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!  I would NOT be cool with that. 

keepinganotebook:

  1. A spider the size of my palm.
  2. A slug.
  3. An earwig. I think this fell from my hair onto the kitchen counter, but that is too horrible to contemplate so let’s say it fell from the ceiling.
I will not sleep well tonight.